<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?><rss version="2.0"
	xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/"
	xmlns:wfw="http://wellformedweb.org/CommentAPI/"
	xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/"
	xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom"
	xmlns:sy="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/syndication/"
	xmlns:slash="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/slash/"
	>

<channel>
	<title>Parenting Archives - Infertili.Tees</title>
	<atom:link href="https://infertilitees.com/category/parenting/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>https://infertilitees.com/category/parenting/</link>
	<description>Infertility Awareness Support Through Written Word &#38; Apparel</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Wed, 14 Feb 2018 04:14:19 +0000</lastBuildDate>
	<language>en-US</language>
	<sy:updatePeriod>
	hourly	</sy:updatePeriod>
	<sy:updateFrequency>
	1	</sy:updateFrequency>
	
	<item>
		<title>My Thoughts On Bringing The Holidays Down a Notch</title>
		<link>https://infertilitees.com/thoughts-bringing-holidays-notch/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Cindy Maudsley]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Wed, 14 Feb 2018 04:03:47 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[holidays]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[motherhood]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[support]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://infertilitees.com/?p=229</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>Several years ago I stumbled upon an article where the author was complaining about the holidays and how some parents over-do it with the celebrations. You know- too much hooplah over the leprechauns, celebrating Pi-day with desserts galore, or over the top- homemade Valentine’s for class parties. My first initial thought was totally agreeing with...</p>
<p><a class="more-link" href="https://infertilitees.com/thoughts-bringing-holidays-notch/">Read More</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://infertilitees.com/thoughts-bringing-holidays-notch/">My Thoughts On Bringing The Holidays Down a Notch</a> appeared first on <a href="https://infertilitees.com">Infertili.Tees</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div data-blogger-escaped-style="text-align: center;"></div>
<div data-blogger-escaped-style="text-align: center;">
<p>Several years ago I stumbled upon an article where the author was complaining about the holidays and how some parents over-do it with the celebrations.</p>
<p>You know- too much hooplah over the leprechauns, celebrating Pi-day with desserts galore, or over the top- homemade Valentine’s for class parties.</p>
<p>My first initial thought was totally agreeing with the author, and sending a mental fist pump into the air.</p>
<p>But then I got to thinking about it the rest of the morning and I changed my thoughts just a bit.</p>
<p>I a mom who likes to make the holidays fun for my kids.</p>
<p>I like traditions.</p>
<p>I like to let my creative juices flow. Being a stay-at-home mom, sometimes I need that, or even <em>crave</em> being able to use my imagination, or put my hands to work through creativity.</p>
<p>I’m sure I’m not the only who who feels that way.</p>
<p>My fondest memories are the fun things my parents did for us as children.</p>
<p>It wasn’t necessarily over the top all the time – but it’s the small things that I truly remember.</p>
<p>I remember my mom turning our milk green on St. Patrick’s Day.</p>
<p>And every Valentine’s Day we were greeted with little gifts and candy on the kitchen table in the morning.</p>
<p>I won’t argue that since social media and Pinterest have become popular- there has been a rise in big, fancy holiday celebrations.</p>
<p>And I don’t think that’s a bad thing or a good reason for someone to bring someone down who does.</p>
<p>You see what our friends and families are doing and maybe it makes you want to do it, too.</p>
<p>Maybe it makes you feel excited about a new challenge or tradition you want to start. Maybe it gets our own creative juices flowing and sparks something inside of you that you haven’t felt in a while.</p>
<p>When did it become a negative to make things more fun for your kids?</p>
<p>Or if it gives <em>you,</em> the parent, some sort of satisfaction, or helps you feel accomplished during the day, I think that is okay, too!</p>
<p>Don’t we all need a little validation every once in a while?</p>
<p>Why not “celebrate others” instead of bashing them and asking for<em> us all</em> to tone it down?</p>
<p>It also doesn’t mean that it is <em>not</em> okay for others <em>not </em>to go over-board, make goodie-bags for class parties or participate in Elf on the Shelf.</p>
<p>Why don’t we all give each other a break, and collectively agree that it is hard to be a parent, and to do fun things with our kids all the time, and to plan activities for every holiday.</p>
<p>If one mom has it in her to do all that, I really think that’s great, and even admire her.  But if you don’t do it all, I don’t think any less of you!</p>
<p>If you don’t want to do those things, don’t do them- don’t feel guilty about it either- because  your kids will still know you love them.</p>
<p>I promise you- they won’t be scarred for life because they didn’t dye Easter eggs {which happens to be one of my least favorite activities ever} either.</p>
<p>Pick and choose what is important to you and your family, and what you feel you can participate in without feeling overwhelmed.</p>
<p>But don’t put down someone else who chooses to go “above and beyond.”</p>
<p>That was my biggest gripe about the article.</p>
<p>Keep in mind, that what you “see” isn’t always what it is.</p>
<p>Remember most everyone puts their best self forward. Whether it be through blogs, Facebook or on Instagram. For better or worse, most people show you what they<em> want you to see.</em></p>
<p>Just because “that mom” is making homemade Valentine’s Day cards and sending a bag filled with goodies doesn’t mean she is also throwing a 4th of July party or making three kinds of pie on “pi day”.</p>
<p>Just because “that mom” is doing the advent calendar with her children doesn’t mean there isn’t a day {or two} that she totally forgets and skips it.</p>
<p>Or completely forget to move her  Elf on the Shelf a day or two here and there.</p>
<p>Just because “that mom” is going all out with decorations for her child’s party, doesn’t mean she didn’t spend forever on YouTube trying to figure out how to make crepe paper lanterns.</p>
<p>Just because “that mom” is setting out Leprechaun traps and turning the milk green doesn’t mean she is also making home-made centerpieces for Thanksgiving, or planning an elaborate Easter egg hunt for the entire neighborhood.</p>
<p>I don’t think there is anything wrong with me planning activities, doing art projects or giving fun little gifts on certain holidays, as long as I’m also teaching my children the true meaning Christmas, and explaining exactly why we observe Easter.</p>
<p>For those less important holidays that have no special meaning, I hope I can still make sure my kids know that we’re doing something “fun and out of the ordinary” because they are traditions, big or small.</p>
<p>And traditions are something I hold very dear to my heart and are very important in our family. They are what I want my girls to remember when they are older.</p>
<p>It is up to me and my husband to make sure our kids don’t feel entitled. It’s up to us to make sure they know that they don’t always get candy and presents every holiday and that not every holiday is going to be fancy.</p>
<p>It’s up to us to make sure it doesn’t go to their heads, and that if we don’t do something the same as their neighbor that it is <em>okay</em> and not everyone celebrates the same.</p>
<p>At the end of the day we are all just doing our best as parents.</p>
<p>There is already too much comparison and criticism in parenting. Instead of bringing someone down, let’s build one another up.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>The post <a href="https://infertilitees.com/thoughts-bringing-holidays-notch/">My Thoughts On Bringing The Holidays Down a Notch</a> appeared first on <a href="https://infertilitees.com">Infertili.Tees</a>.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
					
		
		
			</item>
		<item>
		<title>If You See Something Good In Someone- Tell Them</title>
		<link>https://infertilitees.com/facebook-isnt-bad/</link>
		
		<dc:creator><![CDATA[Cindy Maudsley]]></dc:creator>
		<pubDate>Fri, 26 Jan 2018 04:40:41 +0000</pubDate>
				<category><![CDATA[Infertility Support]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Parenting]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Supporting Loved Ones]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Tender Mercies]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infertility]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infertilitysupport]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[miscarriage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pregnancy]]></category>
		<guid isPermaLink="false">https://infertilitees.com/?p=214</guid>

					<description><![CDATA[<p>There is a lot of negative conversation surrounding  the world of Facebook and Instagram that I just want to remind you that there can also be so much good- if it is used that way.  The experience I want to share touched my life and I never would have had it if it weren&#8217;t for...</p>
<p><a class="more-link" href="https://infertilitees.com/facebook-isnt-bad/">Read More</a></p>
<p>The post <a href="https://infertilitees.com/facebook-isnt-bad/">If You See Something Good In Someone- Tell Them</a> appeared first on <a href="https://infertilitees.com">Infertili.Tees</a>.</p>
]]></description>
										<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div class="separator">
<div data-blogger-escaped-style="text-align: center;">
<div data-blogger-escaped-style="text-align: center;">
<p>There is a lot of negative conversation surrounding  the world of Facebook and Instagram that I just want to remind you that there can also be so much good- if it is used that way.  The experience I want to share touched my life and I never would have had it if it weren&#8217;t for social media.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>We can choose to use it for uplifting others or we can choose to use it to degrade, belittle and break down those around us.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>This experience has taught me to use it for good whenever I can and to act on those promptings that come our way.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>I really love the yard sale pages on Facebook.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>They are groups formed of people in your area where you can sell and buy things from each other.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>A few years ago someone was selling colored twine and I thought<em> &#8220;Oh, yes, I have to have it!&#8221;</em> I commented that I wanted one roll and asked for her address, telling her I would pick it up in two days.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>As it turned out two days later we found out we were having a chemical pregnancy after our second round of IVF and it ended up being a particularly hard, emotional day for us.</p>
<p>The thought of driving <em>anywhere and seeing anyone</em> was the furthest thing from my mind, and somehow the twine was forgotten.</p>
<p>Until the girl selling it sent me a private message.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>There I sat,  downstairs in our basement on our computer with  tear stained cheeks,  my body exhausted as I opened up the private message she sent me via Facebook.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><em>&#8220;Just wondering if you were still interested in the red/brown roll of twine. I&#8217;ve set it aside but there are others interested.</em></p>
<p><em> </em></p>
<p><em>Also, maybe this is super creepster-y, but I usually check out the people coming to my house and I have to say, your family is adorable! You look happy and bright! I&#8217;m assuming you&#8217;re just really good at letting your light shine!&#8221;</em></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>Those last two sentences snapped me back into reality. In that moment my heart skipped a beat as I stared at my computer screen.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>It was so clearly a message sent from above through an angel on earth.</p>
<p>It was exactly what I  needed to hear, it was so clear and distinct that I knew without a shadow of a doubt that this girl, who I had never met, was supposed to send that message to me.</p>
<p>It was meant to lift my spirits.</p>
<p>It  was meant to show me that my Savior, Jesus Christ, and my loving Heavenly Father were aware of me. Of my family. Of my hurt heart and broken spirit.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>Because this was the day that our HCG level was confirmed to be going down {from a number of 51 down to 20}and  was the day we had to come to terms with quite possibly never having anymore children.</p>
<p>We had decided that if this last attempt at IVF failed, we would take a break and it would quite possibly be the last attempt we would make to get pregnant doing fertility treatments.</p>
<p>Not getting pregnant, and knowing we were &#8220;done&#8221; with the treatments and medications- knowing that  unless a miracle occurred-  we would not be having any more babies- was THE hardest thing.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>Something I still cannot fully comprehend or wrap my head around.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>That first day I felt so broken, and lost, and alone and hurt.</p>
<p>I was questioning if my family could really be complete with just the four of us, I was afraid to accept that our family may not being anything more than it was.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>But through the kindness of a stranger, I felt such a strong message that yes, my family can and will be just fine.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>That my sadness didn&#8217;t need to define me. And although, the grieving of never being pregnant again just might take a life time to fully heal, I still had a beautiful family that can shine just as it is.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>I sat there that night I began to cry again. But this time they were tears because I was filled with an overwhelming feeling of love.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>I look for tender mercies in my life with just about everything that happens, because I have to in order to feel peace and be okay with trials sent out way.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>The words that stranger wrote   felt like it was God&#8217;s way of literally shaking me awake, telling me <em>He was there</em>.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>I didn&#8217;t want to freak this girl out, but I quickly wrote her back and told her how much her message meant to me, how much I needed it. I told her briefly about our fertility struggles.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>She quickly responded</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><em>You know what? I definitely felt like I needed to tell you that!&#8230;.Thank you for being so open with me! Sometimes you follow a prompting and think you&#8217;re a weirdo </em></p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>She then went on to tell me that she and her husband recently did their third round of IUI which was unsuccessful.   I was able to tell her that we conceived our girls with IUI, which brought <em>her</em> some faith and comfort that it <em>can</em> happen that way.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>There were too many coincidences to make the whole experience nothing short of having the hand of the Lord in it.</p>
<p>I know that girl was prompted to say those things to me, I know it was a miracle in my life, at the right moment. I am so grateful for this kind stranger, who acted on the prompting to give  such a wonderful compliment on my family.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>It was a simple thing that brought me a few moments of peace and clarity during a time where there was nothing but heart break.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>I know she was prompted to say those things to me and  I know it was a miracle in my life- at the right moment- to remind me that my family is amazing and perfect, and we can accomplish so much and let our lights shine- just the four of us.</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p><a href="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nWY7btakSx8/VlI6FUeArqI/AAAAAAAAuAo/V0m5FCMwAe8/s640/IMG_8597.jpg" data-blogger-escaped-style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img fetchpriority="high" decoding="async" class="aligncenter" src="https://4.bp.blogspot.com/-nWY7btakSx8/VlI6FUeArqI/AAAAAAAAuAo/V0m5FCMwAe8/s640/IMG_8597.jpg" alt="" width="640" height="426" border="0" /></a></p>
</div>
<div data-blogger-escaped-style="text-align: center;"></div>
</div>
</div>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<p>&nbsp;</p>
<div>
<div></div>
</div>
<p>The post <a href="https://infertilitees.com/facebook-isnt-bad/">If You See Something Good In Someone- Tell Them</a> appeared first on <a href="https://infertilitees.com">Infertili.Tees</a>.</p>
]]></content:encoded>
					
		
		
			</item>
	</channel>
</rss>
